Billy sat in the FBI cell with his attorney who said it was not looking good

THE FBI found DNA from the dead undercover agent on you and Bobby

You have Both been charged with murder and their case is solid

I could negotiate a plea bargain if you plead guilty and agree to cooperate with the FBI

Others you are facing the death penalty and will end up being recycled

Billy shook his head in defiance saying I am innocent and so is Bobby

The robbers killed that agent and Bobby even tried to help

The attorney shook his head and collected his papers leaving Billy alone

Billy was determined to fight his innocence all the way

He retraced in his mind every single moment leading up to the robbery

Trying to remember every word that was said and everything he saw there 

He requested his attorney to visit him again

Billy told him he remembered one of the robbers was taking pictures with a cell phone

Presumably to record details how how much wine they were taking

We have to find those pictures to prove our innocence said Billy

His attorney confirmed that a cell phone was recovered from the robbers

But there were no photographs because the phone had been wiped clean

I know somebody who could trace those photos said Billy

His name is Hugo and he lives in a wine cellar in Potomac

I spent a few years in that wine rack alongside Hugo 

Every evening he jumps off the rack and uses the home computer network

Hugo is an expert hacker who can find anything on the internet

You have to go tell Hugo that I need his help

The attorney visited Hugo who listened intensely and agreed to help

Give me twenty four hours said Hugo and I will find the photos for Billy

Just give me the exact location of the vineyard where this all took place

That night Hugo was able to trace the nearest cell towers

He wrote a program to analyze all the traffic from those towers on that day

When the attorney came back the next day Hugo handed him the photos

The robber had texted the photos to his crime boss before wiping the phone clean

You can clearly see the agent being knocked off the table by the robbers

Billy was set free after his attorney gave the photos to the FBI

But Bobby and the Bordeaux brigade of bottles were not released

Under federal law only bottles of US citizenship can be refilled

All other bottles had to go to recycling so Bobby and his gang were all doomed

Billy however was not ready to give up on his friend and hatched another plan

He wrote to the President of the United States requesting clemency for his friends

Billy was taken back at the vineyard for rebottling and he prayed for a miracle

A few weeks later Bobby and the Bordeaux gang showed up

Their French labels were all covered in stamps from US immigration

Each of them was holding a US citizenship certificate after renouncing French citizenship 

 Bobby hugged Billy and thanked him for saving them all

Billy told Bobby it was time he dropped his dumb French accent

Soon you will be full of Virginia wine so get used to being an American he added

Maybe we can watch the nascar race on TV later and then shoot some pool

C’est magnifique replied Bobby with a wincing smile as he gave Billy a big high five

The gang moved quickly to grab every case of wine

One of them whispered lets grab all the uncased bottles

There were a few dozen full bottles on a table

A full bottle fell to the floor while the robbers loaded the cases 

Wine spilled everywhere as the bottle exploded on the concrete floor

The robbers froze for a moment concerned that the noise might attract attention

Casing up the loose bottles soon resumed until they had everything

Bobby and his escapees lay motionless on the floor during the raid

Jumping up as soon as the big sliding door closed shut

Bobby ran over to the broken bottle to check on him

He could find no pulse on his neck and pronounced him dead

The Bordeaux ladies started to weep at the loss and Bobby comforted them

Bobby was covered in the spilled wine which stained his label

Are you still planning to escape from here asked Billy

Absolument declared Bobby in a strong French accent

Zis is no place for us fine French vintage aristocrats

Too many of you rougeneck peasants in zis classless old shed

Billy jumped down and grabbed Bobby by the neck

Nobody calls me a redneck you bourgeois snob yelled Billy

The other bottles formed a circle as Billy and Bobby exchanged punches on the floor

Suddenly the big sliding door slid open and a voice yelled FBI nobody move

A bottle walked in wearing a police cap carrying a gun

There were a dozen more following him all wearing FBI labels

I am FBI special agent Stone he announced and you are under suspicion

Bobby jumped up and defiantly screamed we are all innocent

We will see about that said the FBI agent as his men searched the place

Officer down yelled one of the agents as he knelt beside the broken bottle

Special agent Stone walked over and pulled off the local label from the corpse

Revealing an FBI label underneath he announced that this was now a murder investigation

The thieves were stopped on the highway and they admitted it was an inside job

We had this place under surveillance and one of our boys was working undercover

But now he is dead and we are going find out who is responsible

We are all innocent officer yelled Bobby as he desperately tried to disguise his accent

The FBI agent laughed saying its usually the guilty ones who plead innocence the loudest

He walked up to Bobby noting his label was all crooked and covered in fresh wine

And what might your name be under this badly fitting label he asked

My name is Bobby from Virginia and I swear I did not kill anybody officer

The French accent was a dead giveaway that Bobby was lying 

The FBI agent peeled the label off Bobby and placed it in an evidence bag

A very suspicious crude disguise Monsieur Bobby said the FBI agent in a mock French accent

We will have your label DNA tested to see if its linked to this murder

In the meantime all you empties are coming down to HQ for interrogation

The Bordeaux ladies burst into tears again as they were all led to the FBI van outside

What a mess thought Billy as he sat in the back of the FBI van

Billy saw the big trash can marked recycling

If he went in there it was certain death

Broken into pieces before carrying off to be melted down

He felt a hand grab his neck and he knew it was all over

Bobby shouted be brave Billy who saw his whole life flash before him

Billy recalled all the happy times laying in a wine rack and making friends

He remembered being served at birthday parties and anniversaries 

He closed his eyes when he was just about to be dropped into recycling

Suddenly a voice yelled that is only for the broken glass 

Billy was soon back in the crate next to Bobby 

That was a close call whispered Bobby but Billy did not reply

He was overcome by the emotion of having his life spared

Soon the crate was stacked with other crates and speeding to the local vineyard

It was a short journey in the back of a pickup truck

Bobby asked Billy what the vineyard was like

He wanted to know if was similar to his Bordeaux home

I am afraid this is a lot more rustic than you are used to said Billy

This place is nothing like your French chateau

Its a converted barn and everything is done with volunteers by hand 

The truck pulled into the yard and Bobby scowled this place is a redneck dump

This is not fit for us prestigious French Bordeaux bottles he announced

He was stirring up his compatriots and urging them to escape with him

Billy and the other local wine bottles started laughing

Its a long walk from Virginia to the East Coast they chuckled

Oh and good luck crossing the Atlantic

Here take a cork and float yourself back to France

The Bordeaux bottles formed an escape committee and held meetings in French

Billy tried to convince Bobby his plans were doomed but he would not listen

Their crate was placed on a table in the barn and the big doors were closed

Bobby told Billy his team was ready to head back to France

Billy noted that Bobby suddenly had a much stronger French accent

You will never make it to the coast talking like that said Billy

And your French labels are a dead giveaway

Bobby jumped out of the crate and picked up a pile of local labels from another table

Handing them out to his Bordeaux crew as their disguise

They crudely stuck the new tables over their old French labels in readiness

They lined up alongside the door and waited for the signal from Bobby

It was a long cool night of waiting but eventually the door started to open

On y vas screamed Bobby as his compatriots yelled Vive la France

Billy shook his head in disbelief at this foolish escapade

The big door slid open and sent all the Bordeaux bottles spinning

They had forgotten it was a sliding door

Three men wearing balaclavas entered the barn and started grabbing cases of full wine

They stacked all the cases in a van parked outside

I think we are witnessing a robbery whispered Billy