So you want to roam around Paris

Without being labelled

As a touriste

Who speaks no French

Fear not

Help is on the way

Here is what to do

When responding to anything said to you in French

To signal you do not know

Or do not care

Or do not agree

Just like a Parisian

Take a deep breath

Hands by your sides

Palms facing forward

Stick out your lower lip

Raise your shoulders and eyebrows

Eyes wide open

In a low grunting voice

say BOF

Congratulations

You just mastered the Gallic Shrug