The drive to Glasgow International airport was uneventful

At the checkin they learned their flight was delayed

Hamish knew this would be a problem

Two extra drinking hours for Billy would end in trouble

Security was the next challenge to overcome

Billy got pulled aside when his carry on bag was scanned

Airport security found six bottles of single malt in his bag

He was pulled aside for a pat down body search

Gloved hands ran the length of his out stretched arms

Then up his legs and under his kilt

Bright yellow egg yolk started to run down his legs

Billy was led away by security

The rest of the commando squad got through security unscathed

They waited in the bar but Billy never showed up

Hamish was worried about the deal he had made back in New York

He had accepted a “loan” from a guy called Vinny 

Vinny was part of the New York mafia 

Hamish had promised Vinny that they would bring back a dozen haggis eggs

Now they were down to ten as they sat in the airport bar

Hamish had promised that he would bring back enough eggs to start a hatchery in the US

They will kill us if we don’t bring back a dozen eggs

Dougle was more optimistic and smiling

We are going to make a fortune he whispered to Hamish

Don’t count your haggis before they hatch said Hamish

The three remaining New Yorkers in the squad were drinking heavily

Somebody accused them of wearing their kilts backwards

A fight broke out with chairs and tables flying

Hamish and Dougle quickly stepped outside the bar 

Police rushed in to break up the fight

The New York squad were arrested and taken away

Hamish prayed that him and Dougle would make it back safely

They were now down to just four haggis eggs

The flight to New York was uneventful and they slept the entire way

Immigration was going to be the next challenge 

What’s the purpose of your visit? asked the female officer

Dougle smiled and said we are here on holiday

She looked him up and down and her eyes were drawn to his kilt

The front of his kilt was moving erratically

The haggis chicks were hatching in his underwear

The officer smiled at Dougle as his hands tried to subdue his bobbing crotch

Enjoy your vacation she said as she handed them their passports

Dougle limped outside the terminal alongside Hamish

They were met by four large men dressed in black

Hurridly pushed into the back of a big black limousine

Hamish froze when he heard the words

Vinny wants to see you