Pyramids were power plants built by aliens

When were the Egyptian pyramids built?

If you cannot recall then look it up

Be careful what you read on the internet

There are some fact based articles out there

But also a plethora of weird conspiracy theories

Many of them expertly packaged in convincing YouTube videos

I say convincing only from the style of production

They tell a story with great graphics and scientific references

Aimed at convincing you that all the archeologists got it wrong

No the pyramids are not Egyptian burial sites at all

They were ancient power plants producing electricity 

Drawing energy from underground water sources

The quartz in the compressed granite produced electricity

Which was wirelessly transmitted from the top of the pyramid

Receivers converted the energy into electricity to power light bulbs

It must be true because hieroglyphics show light bulb images

Or is it showing a snake in a jar perhaps?

Wait there is more conclusive evidence

The latitude of the pyramids is a unique number

But that number equals the speed of light exactly in m/s

Proving that the pyramids were built by aliens with advanced technology

As an engineer trained in science and mathematics this makes me cringe

Linking a position on the globe with the speed of light is totally bogus

There are many ways to express the speed of light depending on the units

Why would ancient aliens pick m/s as the magic correlation

Meters were only adopted as an arbitrary measurement in 1799

But of course science and mathematics is just a smokescreen for conspiracy theorists

They can weave a web of deceit and come up with any answer they want

Unfortunately the engineer in me thinks in a different way

I need to see a hypothesis with mathematical proof

Plus an experiment with reproducible data

I can see this all around me in our modern world of machines and technology

Conspiracy theorists paint a picture based on myths and magic

I believed in magic when I was a a kid

Until I discovered science

Cheeky Monkey wishes you happy and safe internet surfing

Remember to take a grain of salt with you

Rain controller

she saw the rain

dashed outside

fine gentle rain

fell softly on her face

looking at the clouds

she whispered

I want more rain

the clouds obliged

the rain became heavier

a torrential downpour

she stood her ground

it rained more

for hours

and hours

soaked to the skin

she looked up

whispered skyward

stop rain stop

suddenly 

the rain ceased

clouds parted

warm rays of sun

kissed her cheeks

she smiled

and whispered

finally it worked

she went inside

her husband frowned

handed her a towel

asked her firmly

will you stop now

you have been trying

to control the rain

without success

almost every day

for eleven years 

please quit now

while you are a winner

Try magic

So you find yourself almost penniless

Spend everything left on lottery tickets

The repair shop gives you a huge estimate

Fix your car yourself with duct tape

Don’t worry about that leaky roof

Just do a no-rain dance

Lost your job

Maybe you will find it soon

Taking too long to read that book

Skip to the last few pages

You forgot your anniversary

Maybe your wife will forget it too

Your cellphone just broke

Perhaps it will repair itself

That recipe was a total disaster

Have a fasting day

Your house burned down

Too late to buy home insurance now

When you are completely down on your luck

Pray for a miracle

If all else fails

Try magic