
Sammy was a young shark
he swam with all the other adolescents
not big enough to swim with the big sharks
but too big to dart around with the babies
he never did fit in with the group
feeling they were all to vicious in killing prey
always holding back in the attacks
picking up scraps of discarded flesh
as he grew’ bigger he worried more
he started to lose weight
his parents became very concerned
sending him first to a shark doctor
who could find nothing wrong physically
Sammy continued to worry and get thinner
his parents decided to send him to a shark psychologist
they spent many hours with Sammy laying on a seabed couch
eventually they figured out that Sammy was vegetarian
his parents were totally shocked
how could our son not like eating fish
whatever did we do wrong in parenting and can we find a cure
Sammy was relieved to learn the news
he decided to come out and told everybody
many of his friends just swam away
not wanting to risk being converted
even some family members shunned him
Sammy spent all day foraging for seaweed
it was hard work to find enough food to sustain him
one day he spotted another shark grazing in the kelp
“what’s your name” he asked
“I am Robert” came the reply
they became instant friends
spending days together looking for vegetarian food
the other sharks were cruel to them
calling them names like “finless vegetarian” and “Sharkweer”
Sammy was upset and Robert consoled him
“Look Sammy” said Robert “these people just cannot handle anything outside their comfort zone”
“they are all Queervegetarianshark Fobics”
Soon after Sammy organized a seaweed eaters pride parade
with floats that did not float and shark drag queens
Bobby met somebody new at the parade
they swam off together leaving Sammy all alone
Sammy got really annoyed at being dumped so publicly
he snapped at a passing fish
devouring him in seconds
Sammy never ate seaweed again