Hamish asked Andy if it was possible to meet with the eastern shore mafia to discuss some ideas with them

That should not be a problem said Andy

Three regular looking guys came to Andy’s house the next day

They were introduced as Andy’s ‘special friends’

Hamish thanked them for dealing with the Vinny problem

He acknowledged that his own efforts to deal in illegal haggis and whisky had failed miserably

There is only a limited market size for moonshine he said

But having seen the number of tourists guzzling liquor in eastern shore bars

There must be a way to expand your business legally

He asked them how well they knew local politicians

They replied we are well connected at every level in this community

Hamish went on to say you should get the state law changed to allow local licensed distilleries

Have them grant you a license and build one right in the center of town here

It will become a tourist attraction itself with tours and tastings

The state will benefit from huge increases in tax revenue from the distillery sales

Local businesses will have access to discounted liquor 

You will not have big distribution costs because your customers are so close 

Andy wondered where they could get the expert knowledge needed to make high quality liquor 

That’s where we can help said Hamish 

If you can get your local congressman to sponsor a bill allowing legal haggis imports into the US

In exchange,  will arrange for some of the best skilled distillers to come here from Scotland

They will teach your team all the tricks to make excellent liquor

But there is one more condition we would like in this arrangement

Dougle, myself and Billy will set up a company that gets sole haggis import rights for the US

The Feds can impose a modest import tariff to take their cut

Seems like a win win for everybody said Andy

Billy pointed out that Hamish and Dougle were only in the US on a tourist visa

Thats not a problem said Andy we will get you employment visas as distillery experts 

Lets talk it over with our local community leaders and see if it will fly

Three years later the first legal distillery opened on the eastern shore

It was a huge success and he eastern shore mafia shut down all illegal activities to focus on growing legitimate businesses

Vinny was demoted to lower ranks in the New York Mafia and decided to turn into a super-grass to eek out his revenge

The New York mafia was dismantled as its leaders and their lieutenants  were all jailed

Billy joined AA and stayed sober

Hamish, Dougle and Billy opened a restaurant in New York, The Haggis Tavern

They sold ‘Lowland’ whisky from the eastern shore

Haggis was the most popular dish on the menu and it became the new American superfood

A whole chain of Haggis Tavern franchises opened up across the US

Scotsmen were able to sample real haggis at Burn’s suppers all over America

Wildfowl hunters on the eastern shore found a new bird to hunt

The haggis chicks that escaped three years ago had adapted well and grown into huge flocks

Hamish and Dougle joined Andy every year for the VIP eastern shore haggis hunt which raised millions for charity

After a successful haggis hunt, Hamish and Dougle were sitting on Andy’s porch sipping brandy and smoking cigars while watching the sunset over the bay

Hamish turned to Dougle and said I have an idea…………