Aliens and steam trains

aliens traverse the universe seeking out intelligent lifeforms

to share knowledge and make friendly contact

they approach earth and detect advanced technologies with space travel capabilities

they make a rapid descent towards North America

scans reveal urban areas with lots of air traffic and radar

not wanting to trigger a hostile response to an invasion

they decide to land on a remote mountain top

After landing they step out and observe a small flying object overhead

they scan for weapons but its just an eagle gliding by

aliens stumble on railroad tracks and are very puzzled

why are these metal rails bolted to the ground they ponder

their inspection is interrupted by an approaching steam train

hissing puffing blowing snorting fills the air as the aliens hide

scans show no weapons but water and carbon lifeforms

is this a living being with an endoskeletal they wonder

as the train passes the aliens get a visual of lifeforms inside the train

scans show the lifeforms are not in distress

the train pushes on up the mountain as the aliens regroup

trying to understand what they have just witnessed about earth dwellers 

they have space technology but still run around in steam powered vehicles

aliens conclude earth dwellers are not yet advanced enough to make contact

they take off and go into orbit to consider their options

the train comes back down the mountain and pulls into the station

space cadet passengers disembark as the eagle soars overhead

they were taking a ride before their next space mission

telling the engine driver it was more fun than riding a rocket

aliens decide leave earth orbit and return again in 2000 years

the eagle soars as the steam train leaves the station

space cadets assemble at a NASA launch pad 

embarking on a mission to explore the universe for intelligent life forms

Alien abduction at the dentist office

I was supposed to go to the dentist during the pandemic

they completely closed down their office for a while

once it reopened I nervously made my way there

hopefully for just a checkup and a cleaning

my instructions were to park outside and call the office

we will come and get you when we are ready said the receptionist

I scanned the parking lot to see masked drivers waiting in other vehicles

the vehicle in the corner was completely covered in a tarp

I hope he did not die waiting I thought to myself

soon a figure appeared at the door dressed in a blue spacesuit

she called my name and I followed her inside

she was wearing a surgical mask and a helmet designed for a welder

my name is Stacey and I am going to take your temperature now

the blue suited spacewoman pointed her ray gun at my forehead

I wondered if her ray gun was a mind control machine

we can go this way now she announced behind her mask

her voice was soft and muffled and she had pretty eyes

in fact that was the only visible part of her entire anatomy

I was soon in the chair maskless and feeling vulnerable

she tried to put me at ease with polite conversation

I love your accent where are you from she asked

England I replied as she dimmed the lights and flipped down her welding visor

her eyes were no longer visible and a bright light emitted from her forehead

this cyclops alien was about to enter my body through my mouth and abduct me

with incredible dexterity she used one hand to hold my mouth wide open

while the other hand poked around my molars with a power washing wand

my mind raced asking myself was this really a dental hygienist or was she an alien

perhaps collecting the rare metal from my fillings to repair her crashed spaceship

the one hidden under the tarp in the parking lot outside

she surprised me by continuing the conversation from earlier

what part of England are you from she enquired

unable to talk properly with all her fingers and instruments in my mouth

I was verbally handicapped and could only pronounce the vowels

I blurted out I….E…. OO

oh Liverpool she said the home of the Beatles

no human could have possibly understood what I was trying to say

she was definitely an alien reading my mind

her spacecraft was still under that tarp when I left the office

I decided it was best not to tell anyone that I had just been abducted by aliens at the dentist