Self meditate is better than self medicate

I remember a time way back in my 30’s

Working long hours to support my family

Young kids and all the demands of home ownership

There was never enough time in the week to relax

Occasionally meeting with a friend for a drink and a chat

He listened to me babbling on about my busy life

Then he said something which shocked me to the core

You have become too boring

Your work has taken over your life completely

You try and devote the remaining time to your family

But you have hardly any down time for yourself

What do you suggest?  I asked

Take a day off and we will go fishing

I remembered fishing as a kid 

I had doubts that it was a good way for adults to pass the time

He insisted so we took a day off to go fishing

We did not catch much but it was a fun day out

Fresh air and nature all well away from the office

I went back to work refreshed the next day

Deciding to try another fishing adventure

Soon it became a weekly ritual

A necessary therapy for my busy lifestyle

Now I had a new rhythm in my life

Work/Family/Fishing

I enjoyed each one more than the old Work/Family

Strangely my performance increased too

I made better decisions at work and had more family fun times

Fishing was initially nothing more than meditation time

Then I became obsessed with being a better fisherman

Learning all about the science and technical skills of fishing

Catching a lot more fish as I applied this knowledge

As my fishing skill improved, my work and family life was more rewarding

It took me a while to figure out what was really going on in my life

Family and work was a constant stream of issues to resolve

By taking time away from them I was able to meditate

My subconscious was figuring out all the solutions while I fished

So next time you feel very stressed and looking for a better work-life balance

Hesitate before accepting the medication your doctor might offer

Put down that self medicating second drink

Don’t rush off to see an expense therapist

Buy a cheap fishing rod and self meditate 

Terrific tapas tales

Dinner reservation for five

A close family affair

The menu was extensive

Crafty cocktails and clinking glasses

While browsing the options

Tapas was the obvious choice 

Everybody got to choose a dish

Plates circulated for sharing

We broke brotherly bread together

Ogled at the oily olives

Family style friendly fun feasting frenzy

Wine lubricated the conversation

Small plates came in waves

Anchovies delicately drowned in olive oil

An octopus danced in a secret sauce

Creamy cod cased in crunchy croquetas 

Aromatic artichoke artistically arranged

Pomegranates permeated the precious salad

Giant shrimp swam in garlic infested oily seas

Fried potatoes played hide and seek beneath a spicy rich sauce

Then a welcome pause

Digestion and delightful conversation ensued

Time passed slowly

Finally the desserts arrived

Cheese cake and a chocolate gateau competed gracefully

We each took a tasty morsel from both plates

The contest was truly a tasteful tie

Three hours had passed in a gastronomic flash

Family bonds became tighter than our waistbands 

Taking tapas home in our treasured memory banks

Family reunion in the Lake District

A family reunion in the Lake District of England

Beautiful scenery is poetry for your eyes

Wide expansive estuaries meet low rolling hills

Tidal waters disappear twice daily

Revealing vast expanses of golden sands

A feeding ground for wading birds

The Pennine mountains watching over you

Protecting this well preserved landscape

Steeped in history with houses built from stone

Quaint little villages waiting to be explored

Well kept walking paths welcoming your feet

Great British pubs offering you shelter from the rain

Have a pint with some fine English cuisine

Order a second pint with friendly banter at the bar

The pace of life is slow and to be savored

Its stopped raining at least for a while

Visit a bird sanctuary to check on migration

Rare birds occasionally stop by to peek at the ornithologists

Holiday makers come in search of tranquil scenery

This is not a destination for sun worshipping night clubbers

Its a perfect place for those seeking peace and nature

The locals here appreciate this unique environment

Quality time here with the family is precious

Enjoying the gift of every moment

Stay cheeky in 2024

Here I am on December 31st 2023

Getting ready to welcome in a New Year

Reflecting back on the last 12 months

My cycling App just told me I covered over 2000 miles

Well short of my 5000 mile annual goal

My bum was in the saddle for over 140 hours

Other challenges in my life interrupted my cycling for a few months

I have forgiven myself for sacrificing some goals 

Smartphones are very useful tools

Creating slide shows and videos of this past year

Reminding me of all the places I visited

All the fun times I had with others

Its really difficult to pick out the best moment of the year

I had so many of them but here is a sample

They are not listed in any ranking order

Watching my grandson perform in a production of Oliver Twist

Spending quality time with my daughter and her family in England

Chilling with my son in Nashville TN

Witnessing my wife being inducted as a Rotarian 

Chatting with my sisters on WhatsApp

Visiting relatives or hosting them at our home

Cycling with my biking buddies

Holding my wife’s hand when we walk

Being in the company of good friends

Exploring new places with dear friends

Waking up every day next to my beautiful bride

The above list can be summed up in one sentence

Being with those I love dearly comes in first place

Owning stuff comes in a very distant second

The Cheeky Monkey hopes you all had a great 2023

Stay cheeky in 2024

Family and Friends

you can stay connected to family even when far apart

it easy to pick up where you left off because they are family

family ties are hard to break and often easy to mend

family is forgiving with never ending patience and love

you have little choice in selecting family members

other than choosing a spouse the rest come as is

there is usually a black sheep in every family

always a weird uncle or aunt at weddings and funerals

families grow with every generation

when you are young the rest of the family seem so old

you bond with brothers sister and cousins

playing in big groups at large family gatherings

as you grow up you start to notice older family members dying off

grandparents pass away to be replaced by your parents

you get married and have kids who join all the other little ones in the family

before you are ready for it your parents pass away

your own children become adults and start to have babies

you become part of the elder group

surrounded by grandchildren who you adore and spoil relentlessly

that crazy young brother still does mad stuff but now takes on the role of the weird old uncle

friendships however are much harder to maintain

it takes a lot of effort to keep friendships going over time

we often lose touch with friends who move away

those parting moments are full of promises that are rarely kept

long term friends grow into honorary family members

your sister from another mother

the brother you never had

you could never imagine life without them

with all the people you meet through work or social activities how do you develop friendships

they don’t exactly apply for the job of your friend with form filling and interviews

somehow you instinctively know when a true friend comes along

investing time with good friends will reap life long dividends

My Dad

Photograph- me with my dad circa 1957

My dad was a kind man

Always helping others

Stopping for stranded motorists

Feeding the homeless

Giving sound advice to those in need

We went fishing together

Quiet times with little said

So good to be alongside him

Such a practical man

He taught me so many things

He was a proud Scotsman

With strong socialist beliefs

Always ready to listen to opposing views

Insisting his own children be well educated

In a neighborhood where most kids had no books in their house

He worked hard to earn a living

Putting every penny into the household 

Never spending on himself

He vowed that we would never go hungry

As he had done growing up in a poor family

He loved his grandchildren dearly

Sadly passing away when they were small

My children have no memory of the great man

Who unselfishly shaped my own life

Thank you Dad, I miss you 

your last summer

Its a real pleasure waking up to warm sunny days

perfect for outdoor living

by midday the heat becomes brutal

you tell me you have to find shade

you say the AC inside makes you feel too cold

how many more hot days will you endure

before you start wishing for cooler times

its sad that you want the summer to end

I remember what you said six months ago

when is was dark dreary and bitter cold

you wanted winter to end forever

and every day to be hot and sunny

when we were young our summers were endless

long days at the beach or by the pool

every evening was dedicated to music dancing and wine

never ending nights of passion

too old now to party all night

you fall asleep watching TV

wine spills from the glass in your hand

please remember to take your bedtime medication

your memories are now short

your tolerance gets shorter

you get grumpy when hungry

you get tired and need afternoon naps

regressing back to your childhood

a three year old mind trapped in an old body

this might be your very last summer

I want it to last forever

Lollipop laughter

Mother

Child

Walking

Shopping

Window

Candy

Child

Excited

Pleading

Purchase

Lollipop

Mother

Succumbs

Lollipop

Given

Smiles

Slurp

Lick

Suck

Sticky

Mess

Loose

Grip

Lollipop

Dropped

Floor

Dirty

Child

Cries

Uturn

More

Cries

Buy

Replacement

Child

Calmed

Vice

Grip

Slurp

Lick

Suck

No

Dropping

Slurp

Lick

Suck

Dribble

Sticky

Fingers

SlurP

Lick

Suck

Lollipop

Finished

Child

Excited

Sugar

High

Running

Around

Jumping

Laughing

Sticky

Fingers

Leaving

Marks

Calling

Card

Sticky

Mess

Everywhere

Mother

Wiping

Vowing

Never

Again

Child

Overexcited

Mother

Fatigued

Lollipop

Laughter

Travel Blog finale

Street party for the Queen

We paused the travel blog while we spent three weeks catching up with family and friends. Today we are flying back to the US so its a good time to reflect on the last three weeks in the UK.

Its hard to describe the pain of being physically separated from loved ones for three long years. For sure we kept in touch virtually throughout the pandemic but its not the same as being together. With the lifting of lockdowns, travel restrictions and quarantine, we planned this three week trip across the pond. We took trains, planes and drove a rental car to be greeted with long hugs from loved ones. We broke bread, drank wine, sipped on many wee drams of fine single malts in front of real fires as we treasured every precious moment of being reunited with our family.

We visited our favorite places in the Scottish highlands, making new memories while reminiscing of previous adventures together.

My daughter moved out of London during the pandemic, taking advantage of remote working to relocate to the beautiful countryside of East Sussex. We fell in love with the Downs, cliffside walks and cute medieval villages there.

During the height of the pandemic, we listened to the Queen of England promising that we will endure the separation of lockdowns and one day all meet again. How fitting that her platinum Jubilee occurred during this trip. We celebrated in style with 5,000 people in the UK’s biggest street party spanning 1.7 miles of the Morecambe promenade. My sister’s jam scones tasted devine as we sat waving Union Jack flags while sipping warm English beer. God Save the Queen.

We shall indeed meet again.

Day 2- Hiking before school detention

Karen and I spent the first night at the home of my sister Kath and her husband John.  Norbie and Maria, our friends from Miami, stayed at the  Carnforth Station Hotel and we started the day having a big breakfast together at home.  Endless cups of tea flowed as we all fought the jet lag of living five hours ahead of our usual time zone. 

Soon we were all bundling into the rental car for a short drive to Jenny Brown’s Point, a local beauty spot.  We hiked along the tiny roads passing cute cottages and a working farm.  We reached the rocky  trail  which lead to the giant stone bench overlooking Morecambe bay. This seven mile estuary is flooded by tides twice daily. The receding tide reveals miles of wet sands  and its a haven for birds. We could see Grange over Sands across the bay and the rolling hills of the south Lakes District. I had seen these views many times before but they always fill me with joy, especially in the company of family and friends making more memories. 

Our next stop was the Old School Brewery, which was once a school, at the foot of Wharton Crag. This very old building had recently been converted to a brew pub serving fine beers and delicious meals. They offered a range of beers with school themed names. After sampling Blackboard and Headmaster we homed in on a beer called Detention.  We had and tasty lunch followed by two long detentions in school that afternoon.  

Back at my sister’s house we relaxed and made plans for the next part of our adventure. I gave Norbie a lesson in fly fishing in the garden. He caught two bushes and a tree. 

We were still jet-lagged but managed to stay up late watching TV and sipping single malt whisky. 

We all slept soundly that night.