Don’t throw away all the memories*

his wife was complaining about all his stuff in the attic

he reluctantly decided to go through all the old boxes

stuff that had been put away for years

obviously not needed but for some reason never been discarded 

he sifted through the contents of the first small box

a tin box full of foreign coins

memories of his traveling days flooded back

places he had visited on business trips and vacations

images flashed through his mind for each coin he touched

an old watch that no longer worked

it was of no value except it belonged to his father

he wound it up and it started to tick

he could hear his father’s voice again

he missed him so much

a notebook from many years ago

containing wish lists of things to do and places to see

they had written it when first married

he read off each item slowly

pausing to recall the joys of each achieved wish

trying to remember why some never happened

bunches of keys from previous dwellings

he held a front door key tightly

remembering opening that door many years ago

seeing his young children run to greet him

they are grown now with kids of their own

a big old bulky calculator he used in college

reliving the hours he spent solving problems with that

the stressful times of exams

he could remember all those long hours of study

he did find some bits and broken pieces

and a collection of old pens and pencils

he carefully put them in a paper bag

before closing the box

he had removed less than ten percent of the contents

over dinner that night his wife cornered him asking if he had cleaned out everything in the attic as promised

he hesitated before saying he had cleared some of it from one small box

she pushed him harder wanting to know why he was keeping all that junk

he insisted that it might be a small box of stuff but it contained a lifetime of great memories

she could see he was getting upset and gave him a big hug

whispering to him softly “I am so sorry, please keep your boxes full of memories”

he replied “thanks, I did clear some space for us to make a few more memories”

Einstein would be proud of you

I have always been a fan of mathematics

Equations for everything

How fast is Infinity

Calculate the square root of tomorrow

How many days until I get happy

What is the solution to the beautiful equation

Mathematics is the key to the universe

Some say beauty is defined

By divine proportions

A mathematical equation

Guaranteed to dispense dopamine

Be it in nature or of human form

A fine painting or a classic car

We all yearn for viewing things so beautiful

When things are not going great for you

Just close your eyes

Go on a virtual voyage

To your favorite place

With beautiful scenery

And cool companions

Enjoy their company

Stay there until you feel happy

Then dare yourself to come back

Open your eyes

Applaud yourself

Award yourself a grade A++++

You have just solved

The beautiful equation

Einstein would be proud of you

wry smile

Morning light

Soft tones

Long shadows

Crisp air

Gentle breeze

Big breath

Eyes closed

Clear mind

Deep breathing

Body relaxed

Positive thoughts

Inner peace

Opening eyes

Saying hello

To myself

I answer

hello back

I ask 

myself directly

you happy

long pause

I answer

yes deliriously

with a  

wry smile

Things that make you go oooooh!

the smell of fresh rain

The sound of a door opening

Stirring hot tea

Hugs

Slicing crumbly cheese

Birds singing

Reading a bedtime story to child

Singing in the shower

Watching the sunrise

Happy hours

Greeting a friend

Sunsets

Key lime pie

Fixing a broken toy for a child

Jazz on the radio

Frying sausages

Mailing a gift

A clean shirt

Holding hands

Making a chopped salad

Firework displays

The sound of the ocean

Exercising

Making a bed

Listening to a waterfall

Adding butter to mashed potatoes 

Cutting flowers in a garden

Fluffy white clouds

A cold beer

A warm beer if you are English

Holding a door open for the person following

A crisp white wine

Smiling back at somebody

The smell of fresh ground pepper

Mending a fuse

Learning to dance

Holding an umbrella in the rain

Flying a kite

Taking a nap

Dreaming

Waking up

Thinking

Writing

Poetry

The sea of mixed emotions

I sometimes get angry 

I don’t know why

it boils up like a raging sea

no way to avoid it

it causes me to explode

I really don’t care if those around me feel hurt

its so much more fun when I am passionate

thoughtful caring and connected

sensual and erotic

nobody can escape my love trap 

lets all swim in the communal happiness pool 

my love drug highs fade away

waves of sadness engulf me

cancer kills my friends

who allowed that baby to die

why did those terrorists kill so many innocent people

I miss my departed mother

war broke out again

occasionally I find myself being really nice

caring and reassuring

calm and collected

peaceful and reflecting

logic and sense flow gently through my veins 

until an uninvited incision bleeds my emotions dry

I sometimes wake up depressed

my life will never be meaningful

we are all doomed

human existence is a waste of time

floating aimlessly in a foggy ocean

suicide hails me like a long lost friend

I look at the sea

endless waves inviting me

intense patterns of reflected sunlight fuel my enthusiasm

its a signal to surf and explore 

rediscover the joys of living and running free

rolling waves of emotion command the passing of time

waves keep crashing in

I must decide which one is mine

no room in my short life for negative emotions

I surf an approaching happiness wave 

it carries me along for a what I hope to be an eternity 

but I am quickly jettisoned into the sea of mixed emotions

Ten minutes to happiness

have you ever tried to figure out what makes you happy

we have all come across somebody who we think should be happier

especially those blessed with good health and a loving partner

I wondered if happiness could be achieved simply by changing the way we think

I stumbled upon an interesting book called Ten Minutes to Happiness by Sandi Mann

she explains that happiness is a trait that you can cultivate within yourself 

rather than a feeling that you wait to be washed over you

her book is based on research in the field of gratification journaling

she recommends you spend ten minutes a day keeping a journal

writing down the answers to the same six questions every day

as your journal expands you should also read previous entries

this will help shift you to a more mindful state of being

here are the six questions to ask yourself daily-

1- What experiences, however mundane, gave you pleasure

2- What praise and feedback did you receive 

3- What where the moments of pure good fortune

4- What were your achievements, however small

5- What made you feel grateful

6- How did you express kindness

I found the sixth question the most intriguing

how could being kind to others improve your happiness

donating a sum of money anonymously can be very gratifying 

research suggest this is far more rewarding than spending that money on yourself

the theory behind all this is that bad feelings tend to overshadow everything else

so by reminding yourself of of the good things in your life you get a better balanced perspective

apparently the more you journal, the more your actions can shift towards happier activities

your ship of life will then steer a course to paradise island- lets all meet up there!

Butterflies in your stomach – YNWA

Can you remember getting butterflies in your stomach

At a time when you were anxious or excited or both

Perhaps on your wedding day

Just before going on stage to perform

At the start of an important exam

During a job interview

Responding to a 911 call

Or falling in love

Your body is programmed

To react to your emotions

Your brain triggers the release of hormones

Giving you a burst of extra energy

And rewarding you with the sensation of pleasure

I can remember getting butterflies on such occasions

But in my case I get them at least twice a week at fixed times

Certainly around 3pm GMT of Saturdays 

When Liverpool usually play in the English Premier League

Today they kick off at 5.30pm un the UK

That is 12.30pm Eastern time in the US

My butterflies have been building up for a few days now

They woke me up this morning

They will be swarming in my tummy at 12.29pm

Just before the game with rivals Arsenal

I know they will soon settle down

Each time Liverpool have possession

My butterflies are instantly forgotten 

When Liverpool score a goal

The joy is off the Richter scale

But the butterflies will be back today

Every time Arsenal gain possession

Its exhausting repeatedly launching butterflies inside you

Fortunately the game only lasts 90 minutes

I pray for a perfect result before and during every game

Liverpool 3-1 Butterflies

YNWA

Mission accomplished

Sometimes words are not enough

He gave up talking

When she stopped listening

Holding her tightly in his arms

A strong manly bear hug

She made no attempt to escape

Melting into him

She released the grip on her imprisoned emotions

Directing her feelings to the door of freedom

At first it was a gently cry

Shedding tears with jagged breaths

Growing steadily into a sobbing wail

Interrupted by short sharp intakes of gasping breath

She became a limp rag doll

Unable to stand without his support

Her whole body shook as she cried

The wailing slowly subsided

Replaced by labored heavy breathing

Her emotional prisoners had all escaped

Strength gradually returned to her limbs

She supported her own weight again

Her arms clung tightly to him

He relaxed the strength of his bear hug slightly

Suddenly he was the captive

She would decide when it was time to untangle

Her cold tears soaked his right shoulder

She lifted her head briefly

Softly brushing the tears from his wet shirt

A ceremonial apologetic gesture

Its Ok he whispered to her

She pulled back but still gripped him tightly

Their eyes locked onto each other

Peering into her soul

His eyes launched missiles loaded with hope

Drilling into the depths of her despair

She made no attempt to evade the onslaught

It was a direct hit

Missiles exploded on impact

Her hope tanks were fully replenished

She acknowledged receipt

With a slow blink

Mission accomplished

Phobias

Photo by samer daboul on Pexels.com

Fear is a basic human emotion. It can be instinctive like not wanting to be part of the food chain in the jungle or more societal as in the fear of being rejected by a group or an individual.  We love to put labels on everything which has led to a wide range of fears being called phobias.  Here are the most common phobias:

Arachnophobia – Fear of spiders

Ophidiophopbia –  Fear of snakes

Acrophobia – Fear of heights

Some unusual ones:

Xanthophobia –   Fear of the color yellow

Turophobia – Fear of cheese

Coulrophobia –  Fear of clowns

Does this mean that people who are afraid of yellow dressed clowns eating cheese are suffering from Xanthoturocoulrophobia?

Let’s assume you have a very unusual phobia like the fear of being given the wrong change in a store on Thursdays when its raining. Your Doctor tells you that there is no name for your phobia but to come back in two weeks while he applies for phobia registration.  

However, you really  want to share your phobia with friends or new people you meet at a cocktail party. It’s pretty cool to say you have changowetthursphobia but less exciting to say there is no name for it.   You are probably wise to avoid meeting anybody until you get your phobia name from your doctor.

It could start a whole new way of finding your ideal partner- 

speedphobia dating, matchphobia.com and newphobiabeginnings.  

If it’s raining on a wet Thursday, just remember to give the exact amount of money for your in-store purchases.

Fear and anxiety battles

she was gripped by fear

an overwhelming sense of mortal danger

there seemed to be no escape from it

no way to rationalize the situation

fear had locked up her ability to think

her body was in panic flight mode

racing heart and sweaty palms

she was not in any physical danger

her fear was purely psychological

suddenly there was a drop in her fear level

she seized the opportunity and started to think logically

taking slow deep breaths and calming her body

taking back control of her own mind

she had caught fear napping

it was locked outside now

she was the king of her own castle

the drawbridges were all up and the moat was full

the fear raiders were circling outside

she watched them from the parapet

they were frustrated and eager to get back in

after a while they gave up and left

it was a beautiful sunny day

she set down the drawbridge and stepped outside

the fresh air tasted so sweet

the warm sun felt good on her face

she sat down to relax and enjoy the moment

telling herself everything was going to be fine

now that fear was all gone she felt empty inside

she decided to fill herself up with happiness

positive thoughts and excitement about the future

her happiness tank was soon about two thirds full

then a huge load of anxiety rushed in to fill the last third

she did not panic at this uninvited rush of emotion

her happiness outnumbered the anxiety two to one

this was a battle she could win easily

she told anxiety to leave peacefully or suffer a painful eviction

anxiety quickly gave up without a fight

happy security guards escorted anxiety from the premises

her happiness tanks were now overflowing