We are pausing this travel blog while we relax with family and friends. It may resume if interesting things pop up during the remainder of this voyage. In the meantime its back to Cheekymonkeypoetry
Enjoy!
Author: Ian Hunter
I retired from the energy business in 2014 and started writing poetry. At first I shared my writing with family and friends. Then I set myself a challenge to write a poem every day for a year. After meeting that goal I just kept going and started this blog in 2021. I hope you enjoy reading my poems. Remember happiness is just a state of mind and poetry is great nourishment.
Day 4-The long journey north
We left early in the morning to head north on the M6. First stop was at Tebay Services for a traditional English breakfast of eggs, bacon, sausage, fried bread and black pudding. English roadside eating had a terrible reputation for many years due to the greasy spoon cafes that served up awful food to motorists who had no other options. Tebay Services is an exception, it was established 50 years ago alongside a working farm that now provides fresh daily produce for the restaurant and farm shop. The food is excellent, the staff are cheerful and the views over the countryside are breathtaking. Tebay has become something of a destination and even the subject of a TV documentary series.
We made a few more rest stops along the way, passing through the City of Glasgow before heading west towards Loch Lomond. Although the day had started dry, the rain set in and stayed with us the rest of the day. By the time we reached Loch Lomond it was a downpour with low cloud obscuring the hills and hanging menacingly over the loch. We had planed to eat a picnic lunch on benches overlooking the loch but had to stay in the car and watch the windows steam up as we passed around sandwiches and drinks. Scotland can be a beautiful place if the weather is kind, today it was not cooperating at all. The rain continued to fall.
The Green Welly is a must do place to stop. You can buy a nice meal, browse the clothing store or purchase your favorite single malt from the wide selection. We skipped the restaurant and clothing store to focus on the single malts. Back on the road again, the rain continued to fall.
We headed west into Glencoe with steep mountainous slopes that are used for skiing in winter. Today there were no skiers sliding down the rain soaked slopes, instead we witnessed white boiling waterfalls and gushing torrents crashing down to the base of the glen. Hikers were out in large numbers all over the glen, their brightly colored waterproof clothing contrasting with the dark rock. We stopped briefly at the Glencoe Visitors Center to learn more about this magical place. The rain continued to fall.
Our last stop was in Fort William to buy groceries for the week. Aldi and Marks and Spencer provided all the food we needed for 8 days but then we were faced with the challenge of stuffing all the bags into the overloaded car. We were only a couple of hours from our final destination so it was not a big problem for bags to be on the floor, on the seats and on our laps. The rain continued to fall.
A few miles further and we reached the Corran Ferry to cross over to Molvern. While waiting for the ferry, we decided to check in on Liverpool FC who were playing Southampton in their penultimate game in the English Premier League. Thanks to modern cell phones and a virtual private network connection we were able to access a channel back in the states to watch the game live. We cannot tell you anything about the ferry crossing as we were all glued to phone screen watching the game. Despite going down to an early goal, Liverpool won the game 2-1. The rain continued to fall.
The rain fell with more intensity as we rolled off the ferry. Driving along single track roads as darkness fell, not seeing a single vehicle for the next 45 minutes. Stopping frequently for sheep sitting in the middle of the road. Rounding a bend to find a herd of deer crossing, they looked at us with total disdain. How dare these humans invade our space. The rain continued to fall.
We pulled up at the Ardtornish Estate just after 9pm. It had been a long 13 hour journey and he only thing left was to unpack the car, have a light snack and a wee dram before falling into bed. The rain continued to fall.
Day 3- Packing, a canal walk followed by fish and chips
There are only two types of weather in England:
Its raining or
Its going to rain
Yesterday day was obviously “its going to rain” because we woke up to heavy rain interspersed by periods of drizzle. It reminded me that my memories of long hot summers in my youth are all fabricated by my mind to prevent me from falling into depression about the dreary English weather. For sure there can be periods of hot sunny weather but they are rare. The most predictable thing about weather in England is its unpredictability. Being an island where no point is more than seventy miles from the sea leaves it open to attack from every moisture laden cloud drifting over the ocean. Its the same law that drives hurricanes towards mobile home parks in USA.
We had arrived at my sister’s house in a rental car with the boot(aka trunk) filled with 4 suitcases and 4 carry on bags. We needed more room for essential supplies to take to Scotland:
Extra waterproof clothing, warmer clothes, groceries, fly fishing gear and most importantly collection of single malts.
We had to get creative to free up some space so the first thing was to empty all the cases and discard anything that was not essential for the trip up north such as shorts, bathing suits or sunblock. All remaining clothing was placed in soft bags. Next it was time to find all the unused storage space in the rental car. Small items we stuffed under the seats, inevitably something would get lost there to be found by a future renter like a time capsule. ‘Oh look I found a left shoe and a pair of socks under here” he will say. Then came the task of packing everything into the boot space with no gaps at all. This puzzle is a real challenge for the male species in the same way that BBQ grilling is mostly a male sport. I am not saying that women cannot pack or grill, its just that men cling onto these tasks as something they must do to prove their worthiness. Women are far more intelligent and graciously leave them to it while solving much bigger problems. A break in the weather allowed me to practice my cave man inherited skills of packing everything into the boot leaving enough space for the grocery shopping. An hour later it was all done and I insisted that everybody come out and marvel at the two cubic feet of empty space I had created. Karen was not impressed and announced “you packed away my coat“. I spent the next hour searching for her coat, which was of course hiding at the bottom and then I had to repack everything again.
The weather forecast was predicting storms in 90 minutes so we decided to make the best of this dry weather window and take a walk along the nearby canal. The Lancaster canal was built in between 1797 and 1826 to move goods between Wigan and Kendal. The canal flourished though the 19th century until it was overtaken by the railways. Today is exclusively used for leisure with barges providing floating platforms to view the beautiful English landscape. Thankfully many of the canal side pubs still exist today providing great start and finish points for beer thirsty walkers. Today we only had time for a short walk along the towpath but we were able to capture some great views of Morecambe Bay and the distant hills. We could hear thunder in the distance so we headed back to Kath’s house to arrive home dry. Minutes later the heavens opened again and it rained the rest of the afternoon.
We rounded off the day with a trip the the local fish and chip shop to introduce Norbie and Maria to another fine English tradition. Fried battered cod with chips and mushy peas! Once wrapped in newspaper, this culinary treat now comes packaged in eco friendly paper cartons but still tastes divine with salt and vinegar.
Day 2- Hiking before school detention
Karen and I spent the first night at the home of my sister Kath and her husband John. Norbie and Maria, our friends from Miami, stayed at the Carnforth Station Hotel and we started the day having a big breakfast together at home. Endless cups of tea flowed as we all fought the jet lag of living five hours ahead of our usual time zone.
Soon we were all bundling into the rental car for a short drive to Jenny Brown’s Point, a local beauty spot. We hiked along the tiny roads passing cute cottages and a working farm. We reached the rocky trail which lead to the giant stone bench overlooking Morecambe bay. This seven mile estuary is flooded by tides twice daily. The receding tide reveals miles of wet sands and its a haven for birds. We could see Grange over Sands across the bay and the rolling hills of the south Lakes District. I had seen these views many times before but they always fill me with joy, especially in the company of family and friends making more memories.
Our next stop was the Old School Brewery, which was once a school, at the foot of Wharton Crag. This very old building had recently been converted to a brew pub serving fine beers and delicious meals. They offered a range of beers with school themed names. After sampling Blackboard and Headmaster we homed in on a beer called Detention. We had and tasty lunch followed by two long detentions in school that afternoon.
Back at my sister’s house we relaxed and made plans for the next part of our adventure. I gave Norbie a lesson in fly fishing in the garden. He caught two bushes and a tree.
We were still jet-lagged but managed to stay up late watching TV and sipping single malt whisky.
We all slept soundly that night.
Day 1- A long 24 hours
It was only a thirty minute ride to our local airport. A tiny place with just two destinations and a few flights per day. Friendly faces greet you at the check-in, the same faces run the departure gate and load bags on the small plane. It reminded me of the circus. Thankfully the pilot was not a clown, we took off only fifteen minutes late.
Stormy weather brought the thrills of a very bumpy ride. The pilot did his best to skirt round the worst weather. We landed safely in Charlotte. Our connecting gate was a short walk away leaving us almost an hour to relax in the Centurion lounge. Despite being crowded, we were able to find seats and grab a quick drink and a hot bite. Lounges are great places for people watching, if the laptop is out, its invariably a business person sipping iced water. Vacationers are the ones sampling every free food item and pounding down free drinks faster than a drunken sailor.
Our flight to London was boarding when we reached the gate. The first 30 minutes was a treasure hunt combined with a dexterity test. I eventually found the socket for my headphones hidden under the armrest and managed to thread the needle and plug them in at the 39th attempt. After takeoff the flight attendants force feed you alcoholic beverages and hot rubber chicken dinner at lightening speed. Most folks nod off during the after dinner movie. The flight attendants all gather at the back of the plane to chat and relax having put the entire passenger list into a food coma. I woke up feeling dehydrated but only 1200 miles from our destination. The inflight data showed our airspeed to be 539 miles per hour. I don’t think I had ever moved so fast around planet earth. We had left home exactly 11 hours ago. I tried to sleep for the last two hours of the flight but failed miserably. My food baby welcomed the inflight breakfast which was really a 1am snack for my biological clock. It was my fifth meal of that day. Travel broadens your mind and your waistline.
What else is there to do during a 7 hour layover at Heathrow other than hydrate and eat. We soon met up with our good friends Norbie and Maria who had flown in from Miami to join us on this adventure. Time flies when you are having fun with friends and shortly after we were boarding our third and final flight of the outbound journey.
Upon arrival at Manchester we picked up a rental car and headed north. Driving on the left side of the road requires concentration especially when travel fatigue sets in.
An hour later we pulled up outside my sister’s house near the lake district to be greeted with overdue hugs celebrating our first family reunion since 2019 thanks to Covid travel bans.
Liverpool were playing Chelsea in the FA cup and we watched the second half on TV. The game was tied even after extra time so it went to a penalty shootout. It was 5-5 after the 13th penalty kick and Liverpool would win the FA cup if they scored next. Adrenalin masked our travel fatigue and hearts raced when the winning goal was scored. Liverpool had won the FA cup.
We all hugged again in celebration before spending the rest of the afternoon catching up on lost time.
We ended our first day in England drinking warm beer at the Canal Turn local pub, reflecting on the 24 hour journey back to my homeland.
Something different
Your Cheekymonkeypoetry writer and his inspiring wife Karen are traveling to the UK for a family reunion. Instead of the usual daily poem or story, we will bring you a daily travel blog. We hope you will enjoy being on this journey with us.
Secret Lives Part 5 finale
Her husband had been moody and detached
Ever since telling her about his favorite author
She was tempted to tell him everything
Living a secret life is hard lonely work
She had amassed a secret fortune
Far greater than he could ever earn
The next day he travelled to a three day conference
Opening the opportunity for her to meet Jack for dinner
Her agent sent a driver pick her up
Jack had chosen an expensive restaurant
The wine flowed and she was enthralled by him
His foundation of secret entrepreneurs was rich material for her new book
Jack held her hand and told her of his plans
He wanted her to meet his contacts in places like Rome, Paris and London
She would get to interview each of them in private
Jack and her would have lots of quality time together
Visiting all those romantic places was on her bucket list but she was trapped
She was both excited and reticent at the same time
Jack was a real gentleman and he could tell she was in quandary
Please think it over and email me your decision he said
She went home to an empty house but not sleep well that night
Her writing was fulfilling but she needed more in her life
Jack had appeared at exactly the right moment
Her heart was pounding as she hit send on her email to Jack
Her husband came back from the conference
She finished her second glass of wine
Staring at the man she married many years ago
It was time for her to confess
I have aways loved you and have something very important to tell you she said
He quickly replied that he had figured out long ago she was his favorite author
I hired an actor to play the roll of Jack he said, I am so glad you turned him down
She smiled, kissed him passionately and whispered start packing for our world cruise
Secret lives -Part 4
Her agent told her all about Jack
He lived a regular life and worked a nine to five job
But had made a secret fortune inventing medical devices
And built up a network of similar people worldwide
Each of his contacts led simple lives
But were amassing fortunes from their clandestine activities
He had founded a charitable foundation
And his group were channeling Billions into it
Her agent wanted her to meet Jack
Jack’s secret life was exactly what she needed to research
She told him to set it up soon
Then rushed to buy food for tonight’s meal
Her husband was more grumpy than usual over dinner
She asked if work was worrying him
No its just as boring as ever he said
I have been trying to meet the author of my favorite books
She froze in anticipation of his next words
I guess she is too busy writing to meet boring old me he sighed
Perhaps best to let it drop she said
She is probably not the person you are expecting
He was unusually quiet the rest of the evening
He did not read in bed
He tossed and turned all night
She wondered if he was having an affair
She checked her emails
Her agent had set up a meeting with Jack
At a neutral venue with some back-up staff for her security
Researching was as much fun as writing for her
She met Jack the next day
Quite a handsome fellow with a charming manner
He insisted on telling his story in more detail over dinner
She hesitated but accepted his invitation
Secret Lives Part 3
She decided not to ask him about the book in his briefcase
Waiting for him to bring it up
A few days passed before he said to her over dinner
I have been reading these great books
Oh really she said trying not to look too interested
An amazing author who tells colorful racy stories
You should read her books he insisted
Probably not my cup of tea she said dismissively
He fell asleep soon after dinner
She checked her emails
More fan mail from Jack
Saying he had an incredible story to tell her
She asked her agent to contact Jack
Thanking him for his fan mail
Maybe have one of his staff meet with him soon
Make sure he signs an NDA before I interview him
Her new book was going to be all about ordinary people
Who led extraordinary secret lives
Achieving amazing things in anonymity
Without ever wanting recognition or fame
Her husband woke up and turned off the TV
Time for bed he announced
They were soon side by side reading
She could not remember when they last had any intimacy
He was reading her latest novel
She felt uneasy when he read passages to her out loud
She was not sure how best to react to all this
A bit too explicit for my tastes she said
The next day she met with her agent at his office
Signing papers and vehemently resisting his requests to go public
Oh I had my assistant meet Jack he said
He has an amazing story to tell you
Secret lives – Part 2
She listened to his workday complaining over dinner
Like a good sympathetic wife
Telling him to watch TV and relax
While she cleared the table and tidied the kitchen
He fell asleep in front of the TV
She pulled out her laptop
Checking her emails while he dozed
Looking for messages from her agent
She found a bunch of them
Urging her to go public
Go on a book signing tour
He had TV shows lined up for her
Her last novel was getting great reviews
Her agent had negotiated a huge advance for her next book
Big fat royalty checks filled her accounts
Her husband snored louder
She had a theme for her next book
But more research was needed
Some of it could be done on line
But she had to interview people face to face
Their stories fueled her writing
She had a talent for making her characters come alive
She read more emails while her husband slept
Her agent was forwarding requests to meet her
One fan letter caught her eye
From a man called Jack
Claiming to have read all her books
Wanting to meet her and tell his own incredible story
Her husband started to rouse
She returned to doing daily household chores
Pulling the empty lunch box from his briefcase
She discovered he was reading one of her books
Cheeky Monkey Poetry 