do you remember the days before online shopping

spending hours traveling from store to store looking for something

hours wasted if you had to return it in person

today its so much easier with click and ship

stuff arrives at lightening speed

and you can return it easily too

unless something goes awry

like yesterday when a shipment of special tools arrived

I needed them to install an air switch for the garbage disposal

the box did seem very light, upon opening it was completely empty

I tried calling customer service but all I got was robot menus

they kept wanting me to go back online and chose and option

but there was no option for the box arrived empty

after about 15 minutes I got a human on the phone

from his heavy accent he must have been in India

I explained the problem to him and he understood

I even told him the shipping weight was in the tracking file

and that weight was identical to the empty box

so it was obvious that the items never shipped at all

its not a problem he assured me we will start a return for your refund

A return of what? I asked

Just return the empty box and you will get a refund in 4-5 days

this is ridiculous I protested

you want me to return an empty box to prove that it is empty?

our system requires proof of return for a refund sir

so just put the empty box outside for UPS pickup tomorrow

all that CO2 emitted delivering me nothing plus the CO2 for the return of nothing?

he insisted it was the only way to resolve the problem so I gave in

I taped up the empty box and threw it on the porch

hoping the porch pirates had no interest in an empty box

I resisted his attempts to reorder the items again

deciding instead to go buy them from a hardware store

I was greeted by a nice human upon arrival

another human helped me locate the tools

surprise surprise it was the same price as online

but without the carbon footprint of shipping

the human at the checkout was friendly and smiling

he bagged everything and wished me luck with my project

I went home clutching my purchase very tightly

I was worried that the bag might be empty on arrival

but all was good and the job was completed quickly

next time I get the urge to click for some tools online

I will wander down to the local hardware store instead

support your local store and save the planet