Month: February 2024

Kevin the cough – part 1 The early years

Ian HunterLeave a comment

The anxious parents carried their baby into the doctor’s office

Telling the doctor the baby had a cough

The doctor examined the baby and confirmed something was in his lungs

Keven the cough knew his time was up

This baby would soon be getting medication that would irritate Kevin

Time to move on and find another baby host to hang out inside

Kevin was a good cough and never life threatening

He was at worst a mildly annoying cough

Kevin wandered down to the daycare center looking for a new host

A dozen infants we’re being cared for

He approached the first one and somebody yelled at him

Find another kid man,  I am already inside this one

So Sorry said Kevin and he moved to the next one quietly

Slipping inside and settling in the lungs for a nap

He woke up when the kid was being taken home

Stealing some food and milk passing by as the child got fed

This baby food is quite tasty thought Kevin

These parents obviously buy the right food for their kid

He was settling down for the night so Kevin went to sleep too

Kevin woke up sweating and sensed something was wrong

The kid was overheating because he had too many blankets

He had to act fast or the kid may overheat and have a seizure

Kevin started jumping up and down in the lungs 

Soon the child was coughing and waking up

Kevin continued to jump around and irritated the infant who cried loudly

The parents picked up the noise and rushed in

Picking up the baby and comforting him

This room is far too hot said the mother turn down the thermostat

OK and Lets put one less blanket on him said the father

Kevin was relieved that the parents were learning

Especially these folks who already had two older children and should know better

He was amazed how inexperienced some parents were

Frequently he had to intervene to bring attention to things

Kevin was like the good samaritan cough

He had been working the infant population all his short life

If you could chose a cough for your child it would certainly be Kevin

Kevin often went walkabout during the night

Once everybody was asleep he decided to sneak downstairs and watch TV

As he was walking down the stairs a voice yelled out to him

Where do you think you are going?

Drone alone

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if you fly your drone

with your mobile phone

in a no-fly zone

you will not stay long alone

soon your cover will be blown

the cops will make you groan

lecturing you in an offensive tone

taking away the only drone you own

putting you in a jail cell all alone

with a pile of mail sacks to be sewn

keeping your nose to the grindstone

nobody will listen when you moan

eventually you will be back home

saving up to buy another drone

taking out a big drone loan

dreaming about where it will be flown

well away from any no-fly zone

crashing your drone into a bridge made of stone

now you have a drone loan but no drone

wife had already left you when you got home

drone-less drone loan and all alone

Would you expect a sick person to solve a Rubik cube?

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I am into the 5th day of a bout of flu

I did get the flu shot but this variant of the virus snuck through anyway

Its not been a smooth ride but I am now seeing the light on the other side

I have been reflecting on the worst moments and how my wife helped mitigate them

The joint and muscle pain was very uncomfortable but Tylenol took the edge off it

My wife has a huge supply which she dispensed every 6 hours like clockwork

There were no issues in taking that medication

Next was the fever which started mild on day 1

But seemed to be more severe on Day 2

My trusty digital thermometer was pulled from the bathroom drawer

I lay back with the probe under my tongue for ages waiting for the beep

No beep sound and the display indicated low battery

My darling wife rushed out to buy a new battery

She came back with a new thermometer

Saying it was about the same price as a pack of batteries

She left the thermometer by my bed for me to use

It was still in the thick clear plastic packaging

I looked for a way to open it with a hinge or door

It appeared to be welded shut all around

I had to cut open the thick plastic with scissors

Not an easy task when you are feeling like crap with a fever

I eventually got the packaging to release its prisoner

My temperature reading was 101.4F

I may have gone up a degree while struggling with that stupid packaging

On day 2 I had an annoying chesty cough which got progressively worse

I started taking cough syrup every 12 hours from a part used bottle

I finished that bottle on Day 3 but my darling wife came to the rescue again

She had already bought back up supplies 

I tried to open the new bottle but the cap would not turn

It was covered in a sort of shrink wrapped tamper proof cover

With no visible tear off strip to open it

After 5 minutes of fumbling and broken fingernails I reached for the scissors

That shrink wrap was so tight it was a struggle to find an edge 

Eventually I got the scissor blade to cut through it without lacerating my finger

Only to find the cap spun freely and would only open when pushed down hard

Not an easy task when you are not on your top form

Imagine how difficult this packaging saga would be for somebody with arthritis 

Why do they make it so difficult the get into these products

Sick people should not need to solve Rubik cubes and escape room clues to open medication

wine serenade

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the bottle was well aged

he wiped the dust off the label

carefully removed the foil

gently pulled out the cork

the aroma from the cork

was a tantalizing clue

this wine was going to be special

he left it to breathe a while

that first pour sent his heart racing

swirling and swishing

deep purple beads rained down the glass

it was time to check the nose

an explosion of fresh berries

wild meadow honey

a slight hint of pepper

bold aromas all fighting to grab his attention

he took a small sip

closed his eyes

tasting the full body

his heartbeat slowed

the long smooth finish was divine

he opened his eyes

poured a full  glass

sat down to read his book

it was hard to concentrate on the text

each sip of this elegant fermented grape juice

took his mind elsewhere

this wine was gently singing to him

you are what you eat (2)

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they say you are what you eat

most of us do not grow or catch our own food

if we share with you the places we get our food

maybe their names will give you a clue as to who we are

on the eastern shore there is a limited choice of supermarkets

we reluctantly roar into the Food Lion den

the quality is mediocre and their range is not extensive

but they do have the lion’s share of the market here

Walmart has some hidden gems in their produce section

its best to dress down when wandering in Walmart

Walmart clients are more entertaining than their food section

we buy a lot local produce from farm stands

you can really taste the earth it came from

especially if you do not wash their vegetables enough

we catch our seafood from the fishing boats at the West Ocean City dock

the prices are great and its incredibly fresh

some skill is required to clean and fillet a whole fish

a measure of bravado is an essential part of the recipe for cooking live lobster

slightly further afield is Harris Teeter

we occasionally drive to Delaware to totter around the Teet

their quality is good but some items are a bit pricey

if we have a reason to go to Salisbury we might launch an attack on Aldi

this no frills store is a low cost version of their estranged cousin Trader Joe’s

Aldi’s German owners vant you to get your schnitzel on

the nearest Trader Joe’s is two hours away in Annapolis

we love trading our greenbacks for the Trader’s delicious specialty items

Every trip to the DC area includes a mandatory shop at Costco

their prices are great value especially for meats

the problem is the cacophony of tempting Costco deals 

we often walk in with a grocery list but walk out with a TV and a new car

DC trips also mandate a wholesome dose of Wholefoods

the range and quality of their produce is excellent

is does however cost a wholepaycheck at their checkout

clearing out the demons

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His overgrown neglected garden badly needed attention

At first he just trimmed back a few branches

But soon progressed into cutting down entire trees

Once dark shady corners welcomed the new light

He toiled for many long days 

Stacking logs and branches into a huge pile

Pausing to look at the cleared land

Visualizing new plantings and future flower beds

The thought of hauling away all the cuttings was overwhelming

Much easier to to burn it he concluded

He was inexperienced in making fires

The moisture laden wood created more smoke than flames

He went into the house looking for dry combustable material

Dragging out boxes full of old papers

Pausing to look at old photograph albums

Faded images of his departed wife were added to the pile

Tables and chairs were broken up and dragged outside

The pile got bigger and bigger

Progressively he cleared every room in the house

Bad memories were being purged

Throwing a single lit match into the massive pile

He stood back and watched the flames grow

The fire took on a life of its own

Crackling hissing and billowing smoke

He was hypnotized by the flames

Suddenly the wind picked up

Sending sparks high into the sky

The fire became an inferno fueled by the wind

He watched the burning embers land on the roof

Not wanting to intervene he decided to let the fire do its will

He felt strangely calm watching his house burn down

The demons of his past were finally gone

Suddenly the phone rang

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suddenly the phone rang

no caller ID

I leave it unanswered

no voicemail

suddenly the phone rang

another 800 number

must be a sales call

I block that number

suddenly the phone rang

its that annoying friend

not picking up today

let it go to voicemail

suddenly the phone rang

I am too busy to look

just let it ring out

I will check it later

suddenly the phone rang

not in the mood to talk to him

switch the call to voicemail

he can always text me

suddenly the phone rang

I think its my doctors office

another disguised robo sales call

I hang up

Suddenly the phone rang

its my son so I answer

just random noises

he pocket dialed me

suddenly the phone rang

she only calls if its important

I wonder why she is calling now

it rings out before I could answer

What will be left at the end?

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I have always tried to spend wisely

not to live beyond my means

keeping debt down to an acceptable level

never failing to pay off the credit card every month

always trying to save for that rainy day

I have never purchased a brand new car

for fear of the depreciation in value

I make budgets and track spending diligently

but one thing keeps coming around and around

there never seems to be enough month left

at the end of the money

If you knew your life was ending today

would you regret how much money you had spent

or be proud of how much you had saved

I doubt that either would seem that important

amassing possessions or great wealth means nothing 

its how you live your life daily that brings fulfillment 

the wind in our faces blows equally on us all

those who decide to embrace the wind

and to marvel at sunrise and sunset

will feel they lived their life well

even if they did spend more money than they budgeted