Nashville trip
Music city
Noisy bars
Honky tonk
Country music
Cowboy boots
Big hats
Martin’s BBQ
Beers flowing
Bachelorette parties
Happy people
Endless nights
Hangover mornings
Music City
Month: November 2022
Every twenty years or so
Wondering where to eat last night
Somebody suggested a Japanese steak house
Something I had not done for twenty years
It was almost full on arrival
They squeezed us in at one corner
Nine hungry faces on three sides
A shiny hot plate in the middle
A waiter took our orders
I chose chicken and shrimp
We smiled and nodded at our neighbors
Sipping cold sake and waiting for the show
The chef wheeled in a cart piled high with food
He verified the order for each person
Before performing a juggling act
With a pair of very sharp knives
We were all waiting for a severed finger to drop onto the hot plate
Thankfully that never happened
Next he squirted a pool of oil and ignited it with a lighter
A huge fireball shot up into the vent hood over the table
Everybody checked their eyebrows
He brought out some raw eggs for more juggling
Smashing each one ceremoniously
They sizzled and hissed as he chopped and mixed
Beating a rhythm into the food
The eggs cooked fast
Boiled white rice was dumped over the eggs
More oil and butter was added
Finally a squirt of soy sauce
Moving every grain of rice in a beating blur
Piling each portion onto the side of a cleaver
Expertly launching fried rice onto each plate
We all smiled in appreciation
As the steak, chicken, prawns and scallops danced on the searing hot plate
The razor sharp knife reduced the slices of meat into bite size chunks
Added to our plates alongside the rice
A mountain of vegetable filled the hotplate
Slicing and dicing as they shrunk into an oily hot lake
An onion was expertly sliced into rings
Reassembled into a volcano
Filled with oil and lit for the finale
Flames erupted from the top
Applause erupted too
The show was over
It was time to eat
The food was delicious
Nobody seemed to mind being splashed with soy sauce and fried rice
When we got home our clothes reeked of fried oil
A pungent reminder of an unforgettable meal
I might go again, perhaps twenty years from now
What did he just say?
I started to dread noisy places
crowded bars, busy restaurants and parties
straining to follow conversations
I smiled and nodded a lot
probably at the wrong times
my hearing has deteriorated over time
this could not be ignored any longer
a trip to the audiologist ensued
confirming what I already knew
my hearing was down by fifty percent
it was time to get hearing aids
the choices were vast but costly
after many hours of research
a decision was made
opting for the latest AirPods
far less expensive than conventional hearing aids
but technically as good if not better
the setup was smooth and simple
my hearing test results scanned directly
optimism when I popped them in
the difference was dramatic
I could hear so much better at home
listening to streaming music was so much fun
but what about in a noisy environment
we picked the loudest restaurant for dinner
I added a small wireless microphone
clipped to my chattering bride
switching the AirPods to mute all external sounds
apart from those transmitted from her microphone
I beamed when I listened to her voice
crystal clear in my ear
normally drowned out by the background noise
I put a second microphone on the table near our guests
instantly transporting me back into the world of dinner table conversation
with one small problem to overcome
with the background noise eliminated in my ear
I did not instinctively raise my own voice
nobody at the table could hear my softly spoken words
as they all shouted at each other over the background din
I might buy them all AirPods for the next meal
I wonder what women think of while staring at the ceiling
I went to the dentist yesterday for a cleaning and checkup
always a nervous experience
will they find something wrong with my teeth
could it be a long and uncomfortable procedure
it was even scarier during Covid
having to wait outside in the car
being summoned by phone and shuffling in masked up
all the staff in spacesuits and helmets back then
they looked like aliens
but yesterday was a pleasant surprise
Covid restrictions were lifted so no masking for me
the staff we no longer in spacesuits
my hygienist, Stacy came out to fetch me from the waiting area
it was nice to see her pretty face again
well most of it because she wore a surgical mask
she made me at ease and I was soon staring at the ceiling
she chatted away during the cleaning
I grunted back with my mouth full of dental tools and suction hoses
the chair was almost horizontal and my gaze fixed on the ceiling
something was not right
the drop ceiling had a panel open for lighting
2 rows of fluorescent tubes behind a grill
they had been installed at a slight angle, not parallel to the ceiling tiles
it started to annoy me intensely, I could not stop staring at it
what kind of contractor would put in crooked lighting
in an office full of high tech Xray machines and expensive monitors
Stacy finished my cleaning and the dentist came in to examine me
everything looks fine he said, do you have any issues
just one I replied, those lights above are not installed properly
Stacy started to laugh, all my male patients point that out
then it hit me, this was no contractor error
dental psychologists ordered those wonky lights as a distraction
to keep your mind off thoughts of discomfort during procedures
it certainly worked for me so well done Mr dental psychologist
but this now begs the question, why does it only bother the male patients
I wonder what women think of while staring at the ceiling
Be NOMINAL
I set my alarm for 5.20am
Five minutes before the launch window
Of a rocket bound for the International Space Station
From the NASA Wallops facility
Forty miles south of my home
I fell asleep thinking about rockets
Dreaming about rockets
Waking up to the alarm thinking about rockets
Quickly dressing while listening to the live countdown
Stepping outside on the balcony at T minus 60 seconds
It was pitch black with low clouds
I knew where to look from previous launches
My eyes were glued to the dark horizon
As the flight director announced MAIN ENGINES START
My heart was racing
A bright white glow appeared on the horizon
LIFT OFF!
Streaking skyward for a brief few seconds
Disappearing behind thick clouds
I lost visual contact but could hear the roar of the rocket engines
Listening to the live NASA feed on my phone
Calm voices reading off the flight checklists
They kept saying things were NOMINAL
Within a few short minutes, the payload was in orbit
Somewhere over Australia
Always a thrill to witness a rocket launch
Such an amazing feat of engineering
My excitement was way beyond NOMINAL
I decided not to go back to bed
Opting for watching a very NOMINAL sunrise
While eating my NOMINAL breakfast
After writing a very NOMINAL poem
I started the countdown for the launch of my NOMINAL bicycle in a few hours
Going through the pre-ride checklists
Tire pressures NOMINAL
Lights function NOMINAL
Brake test NOMINAL
Gear change test NOMINAL
Water bottle top-up NOMINAL
We are GO for the bike ride at 8.45am Eastern time
Owl Chatter
It was a very dark evening
low clouds hugging the ground
soaking everything
damping down all noise
no traffic on the street
everybody was hunkered down for the night
the silence was almost total
stepping outside to put the trash out
my footsteps were deafening
something compelled me to remain outside a moment longer
suddenly an owl hooted
hoohoo hooooooo
another owl hooted back
hooooo hoo hoo ho
long and short hoots in bursts
morse code of the night forrest
potential prey staying silent
not wanting to attract attention
leaving the owls center stage
no moonlight or twinkling stars above
eternal blackness and cold damp silence
a perfect night for long range nocturnal raptor chatter
back inside the TV was blaring
imported artificial noise felt lame
turning off the TV and all the lights
listening intensely in the dark silence
a faint hoot beckoned me to open a window
owl banter flooded the room
hoooo hoo hoo hoooo hoo
more entertaining than a Netflix script
but I wondered what they were saying
staring at the TV remote
fantasizing there might be an owl subtitles button
they kept hooting all night
hooooooo hoohoo hoo hoo
Cheeky Monkey Poetry 