they waited until she was sleeping soundly

the boots pushed open the closet door

the flat shoes crept out silently

returning soon after with her cell phone

the smart casuals composed a text to him

I have you on video stealing my shoes

return them by mail immediately

otherwise I go to the police

do not reply to this text

after the text was sent it was deleted

the smart casuals put her phone back

the boots closed the closet door and whispered

do you think it will work

the smart casuals said confidently

he has no choice but to comply

a few days later a package arrived 

the high heels were soon back in the closet

all the shoes were ecstatic

the high heels hugged everybody for the rescue

recalling the details of her time as a hostage

his closet was a nasty mess

it was horrible being dumped in there

those guys were all drunk and belligerent

but his flip flops protected me

we slept together in the back of that closet

and then I was returned in the mail

the flat shoes made a declaration

now we can get back to our old life

no more wild parties booze or smoking weed

a few weeks later the high heels were crying

the flat shoes were very sympathetic 

its going to be fine just tell us what is worrying you

the high heels blurted out

I am pregnant

the boots were concerned

it will be hard to hide a pair of baby shoes

the smart casuals led the rallying cry

we girls can achieve anything if we stick together

a few weeks later the high heels went into labor

they all took turns looking after the babies

keeping them well hidden in the back 

they grew up into a fine pair of shoes

She found them one day declaring

I do not remember buying these

but I will wear them anyway

the flip flops kept the ladies entertained

telling them stories about all the places he had been

exotic beaches expensive spas and luxury hotels

they hung onto every word he said

the high heels were spellbound

He is so handsome and worldly

I think I am falling in love with him

the boots were not impressed

he is just a hippie pot head 

you could do a lot better

the smart casuals disagreed

man this weed is so good

it makes his stories more interesting

the flip flops and high heels should hook up

the smart casuals took another puff of weed

peace love and Woodstock

the flat shoes were unimpressed

this used to be a nice respectful closet

now its degenerated into a drug crazed free love commune

next time the door opens I am running out of here

later that day the door opened

the shoes were surprised that it was him

now where did I leave my flip flops

he frantically rummaged through the closet 

finding them in the back snuggled up with the high heels

he took the flip flops and his bag of weed

he went to leave the room but turned round

reaching back into the closet

he grabbed the high heels

announcing they were now his hostages

the closet door closed with a bang

the flat shoes shoes spoke first

we are in big trouble now

first we lost all the guys

then we lost our hippie drug dealer

now one of us has been kidnapped

how will we ever get the high heels back

the smart casuals took control of the situation

calm down everybody

I have a plan

he denied drinking all her booze

she accused him of being an alcoholic

the argument was intense but short

he flung open the closet doors

scooping up all his shoes in a rage

soon everything went quiet

the flat shoes started to complain

well there goes the end of our fun times with the guys

she will never bring a man home again

the smart casuals agreed

it was fun while it lasted

I am going to miss those guys

maybe she will buy some more shoes soon

the high heels were pessimistic

she is probably depressed now

she may not even go out for a long while

we will be lucky if anybody gets to leave the closet

the dancing shoes joined in

I guess her dancing days are over too

I might never see a dance floor again

the boots recalled the last time this happened

remember when she broke up with that other guy last year

we all stayed in this closet for months

she lost interest in wearing any of us

she hardly left the house at all

wandering around barefoot all day in her PJs

what is that noise in the back

it sounds like snoring

the boots went to investigate

look its his flip flops

he left them behind in the back of the closet

the flip flops woke up in a daze

hey ladies whats going on

the boots explained the situation to him

he did not seem all that bothered

those guys were all boring anyway

I am happy to stay here and chill with you ladies

the high heels giggled with excitement

I guess we can all share him

the flip flops just grinned

hey ladies I have a big surprise for you

he also left his bag of weed behind

let all get stoned

the flat shoes shook her head

the mens shoes were noisy

all laughing and high fiving

the scuffed up cowboy boots seemed to be their spokesperson

hey guys we just hit the closet jackpot

there must be two dozen pairs of cute chick footwear in here

we gonna have ourselves a load of fun

he marched around the closet looking at all the girls

the smart casuals respond angrily

you should show more respect

we have no room for misogynistic behavior in this closest

the mens flip flops chirped in next

hey dude take it easy

lets just chill and be nice to the ladies

be respectful and friendly man

the cowboy boots sulked off to the back of the closet

the worn out mens sneakers spoke up

lets have a party to break the ice

I found some booze hidden in the back of the closet

he passed the bottle round 

somebody started singing

soon the party was in full swing

they cleared a space in the middle for dancing

the dancing shoes put on a fine display

the high heels were having a great time

oh this is so much fun

what a treat to have boys in our closet

the flat shoes were concerned

this will end badly just mark my words

the party continued all through the night

they drank all the booze

they all snuggled up and fell asleep

there was no longer a mens section in the closet

they were all scattered amongst the girls

the closet door opened in the morning

she was not amused at what she saw

blaming her man for the mess in the closet

she tidied up her shoes but left his in a pile

she picked up the empty booze bottle from the closet floor

she was furious with him

she launched a verbal assault when he entered the room

a massive argument ensued

she was waving the empty bottle in his face

the shoes all looked on in fear

the mens shoes were gone before dawn

the high heels had a hangover

the sandals were not impressed

serves you right for partying too hard

you are a disgrace to the closet

the flip flops disagreed

leave the high heels alone

all they did was have some fun

the boots joined in the fray

this is a female closet we do not want mens shoes in here

quiet said the flat shoes she is coming over

the closet doors opened

she was holding a large black bag

she reached into the back of the closet

one by one the shoes she no longer wore went into the bag

a few times she paused with a sentimental look on her face

then unceremoniously tossed the shoes in the bag

it was all over in a few minutes

the closet door closed again

almost a third of the shoes had been culled

the new fancy shoes started to cry

we have lost a bunch of our friends 

and we only just got to know them

the sandals where staying practical and logical

look its natural that some of us have to go

she will buy new shoes to replace those we lost

the high heels were all melancholy

what will happen to the shoes in the bag

its sad to think they will never be worn again

the boots were more conciliatory 

those were all good shoes

too good to be tossed into the trash

she will either give them to friends or donate them

we will soon be making new friends with the replacements

the high heels yawned through lack of sleep

the sandals took control

look we were kept awake all night

those snoring mens shoes were a disgrace

lets all take a nap

we can dream about all the new shoes she is buying now

the shoes stopped talking and soon fell asleep

later that day the closet doors opened

she moved all her shoes to one side

leaving about a third of the closet space empty

she filled it with eleven pairs of mens shoes

she brought home some casual shoes

put them in her closet

as soon as she closed the door

the sneakers piped up

oh look at you fancy new casuals

I bet you will be going to some cool places

not so fast said the high heels

the best places are reserved for us

the casual shoes tried to make peace

hey she has plenty of foot time for all of us

all the shoes from last year hunkered down at the back

not knowing if they would ever be worn again 

they prayed they would come back in fashion again soon

they were dreading the fate of being donated

hey look said the sandals

she is walking barefoot again

such a waste cried the flat shoes

she needs to wear us instead

the boots in the back broke out into a chorus

these boots are made for walking

all the other shoes winced

we hate that stupid boots song

look out she is coming back cried the flip flops

the door opened and the shoes all went quiet

the dancing shoes were pulled out

and a pair of very sexy high heels went too

there was constant gossip for the rest off the evening

who is she going dancing with

what time will she be back

we expect a full report from the high heels

much later that night the dancing shoes and high heels returned

along with a pair of mens designer shoes 

her shoes did not know what to say

none of her shoes slept a wink that night

it was the first time male shoes had been in that closet

the male shoes snored all night